Lent already?

Whoa. When did Lent sneak up on me?

Clearly I’ve been out of it for a while because I suddenly looked at my calendar today and saw that it is Ash Wednesday. Did it sneak up on anyone else too? Perhaps this explains all the weird Facebook status updates about not using Facebook for the next 40 days?

So last year I attempted to give up alcohol for Lent. Not because I have a drinking problem (which is nothing to joke about) but because I thought it would help me save money and concentrate on finding ways to spend time with friends outside of happy hour. Well it was an epic failure because I forgot and only realized it halfway through a happy hour at Fado’s in downtown Austin a week into Lent. But, I figure it is fate that I forgot about it because that is the happy hour where I met Rahul!

This year, after quickly debating (read: today) what I am going to give up for Lent I decided that I’m not going to give up anything. I won’t get deep into religious doctrine, because everyone has their own beliefs and why would you care about mine… but basically, I don’t feel like giving up something like dessert, beer, or meat will bring me closer to God.

Instead, I am going to continue to live my life as usual, but save all my receipts from coffee shops and bakeries — purchases that I consider total luxuries and certainly not a necessity. At the end of Lent, I will total up how much I’ve spent on all of that and donate it to a charity. I’ve yet to choose a charity (suggestions?) but I am thinking something to do with the military since my big brother is in Afghanistan. It won’t be much money, I’m guessing maybe $30-40, but maybe I’ll divide it into a few small donations to a few charities.

I also saw this, the 40 Days of Water mission that looks amazing. If I hadn’t failed so miserably to give up alcohol last year I might consider it. But I think this sounds incredible! Let me know should you feel so inclined to participate — I’d love to hear your experience! (And it doesn’t have to be for religious reasons, either!)

So are you giving up anything for Lent? Do you have a suggestion for a charity? Do you think we church goers are crazy?

some January motivation

Ahh January… the time of year when gyms are overcrowded and diet commercials abound! Some people take January seriously, and others are totally annoyed by the so-called “January joiners” who invade the gym and produce section. When people roll into the gym with jeans and water bottles full of Diet Coke (bless their hearts), I have to force myself to remember one thing: that was me 3 years ago. Lost, unhappy, 250 lbs, but trying to fix it.

Yep, 3 years ago today I started to change my life on my own terms. As I’ve written about before, my dad died in November of 2008. Here is a picture of me from my mom’s wedding, just a day after his funeral:

Shortly after this, I finished my semester and had about a month of winter break to process things. Slowly, the wheels of change started to spin in my brain and I found blogs about healthy living and weight loss. I investigated my choices. I invested in myself. I started Weight Watchers on January 12, 2009.

I learned about making smarter choices with my food. I liked the burn I felt in my muscles when I exercised. I knew that I had to do something proactive to become a happier person and turn things around for myself. It all started to click.

I started on the elliptical, moved to running (using the Couch to 5k program!), and ran my first 5k! I then ran a 10k and a handful of other 5k’s. I got back into swimming, my childhood sport and first love. I took spin classes. I was healthy.

Over the next year and a half, I lost 80 lbs. I was happy. I was a new person.

In the 1.5 years since I’ve moved to Texas, I gained 10-12 lbs back (depending on what day you asked me). I got a little disheartened after falling out of some new habits and back into some old habits. But since August I’ve been trying to pick myself back up by my bootstraps (because I actually have bootstraps now) and I’ve gotten back on the bandwagon and lost the “moving-weight”. Now, I’m looking forward to getting rid of the final 15 lbs I want to shed. Full disclosure: I’m using Weight Watchers again and have been since November.

So why am I sharing all this with you? I wanted to write it out for myself as some positive reinforcement and motivation for me, as well as anyone out there looking at the calendar and wondering if this year is the year. It is! I did it. And not to sound like one of those tv commercials but… if I can do it, so can you. It wasn’t always easy, and it certainly wasn’t always pretty, but I did it.

My advice: pick some small things you can change and go from there. One change will snowball into another. You’ll be amazed at what you continue to accomplish. Find yourself a mantra (the one I’m using these days was 100% stolen from the Minute Maid orange juice slogan, but it works): “Put good in, get good out.”

Are you using this January to change things up? Are you looking for ways to get healthier? Did you already find a better lifestyle? I want to hear everyone’s stories! I need the motivation and I know other people want it, too!

 

my resolutions 2.0

[By the way, I think I'm really witty by writing "2.0" all the time now. It is like I finally caught up to 1999 and understand computer-ish speak.]

So January 2012 is just moments away and resolution fever has hit the blogosphere and the TV commercial airwaves like wildfire.

Last year, I posted my resolutions on here for y’all to see. I think I did pretty well, having gotten better at flossing my teeth and I did manage to lose 10 lbs, which puts me back at my pre-Texas weight. However, without real access to a grill, I did not master the open flame. I also did not post a how-to video, but only because I learned that WordPress charges obscene amounts of money for videos. And I’m too cool for YouTube, let’s be honest.

So what are my new New Year Resolutions?

1. Stop correcting people for putting the apostrophe-s on “New Year’s”, as in “Happy New Year’s”.

2. Complete my first half marathon (planned for February 19th!) and run the Army 10-miler in October in DC, for my brother!

3. Lose another 15 lbs and finally finish what I started 3 years ago.

4. Continue to floss teeth more regularly.

5. Increase savings account by 50%, despite another cross-country move (in May) and no employment over the coming summer.

What are your resolutions for 2012? Anything interesting or different? 

And now, I shall leave you with a picture of me + Zack Efron hanging out at my family’s White Elephant gift exchange.

 

another year

Today marks the 3 year anniversary of my father’s suicide. I cannot believe it has been 3 years. Some days it feels like yesterday, some days it feels like a lifetime ago. November 21, 2008 changed my life forever.

For the past 3 years, I have cried nearly every day. Sometimes, there were happy tears upon remembering a stupid joke my dad told. Sometimes, there were big, heaving sobs of pure grief and sadness. But in the past 3 years there’s been one feeling that has stayed with me: guilt.

I have felt incredibly and inexplicably guilty for my father’s death. The day I found out that he had willingly ended his own life, I started to believe it was my fault. I started regretting all the things I could have done, all the signs I had ignored. I was miserable knowing that he had been so miserable and I had done nothing to help.

In the past year, I’ve come a long way with accepting his death and releasing myself from guilt. Sure, I still have days where I cry about what has happened and fail to understand why it did. But most of the time, I am happy knowing my dad is at peace at last and is smiling down on me, cheering me on with everything I do. I bet he really likes Rahul, even though he’ll never get to meet him. I bet he thinks I’m crazy for running a half marathon. I bet he’s so proud of me for going to graduate school.

3 years ago today, when I was told that my dad was dead, I was on the way to DC, a weekend trip to visit the National Zoo and some museums. Tomorrow, I leave on a plane to go to DC and visit the man who I am desperately in love with. He lives 3 blocks from the National Zoo. Life is funny, isn’t it?

Tomorrow I touch down in DC and complete what I was incapable of doing 3 years ago. Today I forgive my father and myself. Today I take another step further in a life I now have to live without my father. Today I try to be happy and remember what an amazing man he was. 

Rest in peace Daddy. I will always love you.

<3 Christopher Arthur Gleason 2/10/63 — 11/21/08

no fun november

Apparently people are participating in No-Shave November by growing beards and lovely lady leg hair.

I will not be participating in that. However, I will be participating in No Fun November in an effort to push myself to do something not fun, but which will help me.

With the input of some friends and a few ideas of my own, here are my No Fun November goals:

1. Do 15 push ups every day with correct form <— I usually wimp out and do the girl push ups;

2. No fried foods (as in, deep fried);

3. Find a way to get back into yoga, no matter what;

4. Drink 8 glasses of water every day!

Are you going to make any No Fun November personal goals?

we run so they can read

I am sure many people are familiar with the concept of running races to raise money. I think Relay for Life is one of the biggest fund-raising efforts that uses running/walking as their platform. You may also be familiar with Team in Training that trains people to run half and full marathons to raise money for leukemia and lymphoma research.

But did you know that you can run a race to help end illiteracy in India? That’s right. And guess who is running it? This girl.

(Can you spot the lone white girl?)

I’ll be running the Livestrong Austin (Half) Marathon in February of 2012, a feat that sounds laughable to me at the moment as I’m grossly out of running shape. The elliptical in the air-conditioned gym and I have become fast friends this 105*+ summer. But I’m strapping on the running shoes and questioning my decision every day as I train with Austin Fit to run for Team Asha.

While no one charity is better than another, I happen to be running for this cause because it is very dear to my heart. For starters, I am in graduate school for a degree in literature… something not easily attainable for children who don’t have access to quality education. Literacy is something I’ve taken for granted my whole life, having grown up in suburbia with a great school system.

And as for why Asha and not another children’s charity… well there’s a man I’m in love with and he is from India. It seems pretty logical to me. I want to help other people from the country that provided Rahul with the educational foundation to come to America, continue his education, get a job in Austin, and meet and fall in love with me.

I don’t yet have my fundraising page up, but when I do, I will certainly post it for y’all. I know that the economic climate is not favorable right now, but if you can find it in your heart to donate even $5, that would help tremendously. Think about it: for the price of 2 coffees at Starbucks, you can help me raise money so millions of children can read. 

Thank you all for your continued support — I look forward to training and running for the kids of India and for all of you!

blog hiatus

Hey y’all! Greetings from Austin, TX where the high has been 104* for the past week.

So I’ve been pretty lame lately (don’t argue otherwise, you know it is true). I am working 2 summer jobs and have a busy chunk of summer still ahead of me, including a tearful Father’s Day remembering my Dad, my 23rd birthday, a mystery vacation with the boyfriend, making money, studying for my master’s exam, and other big changes. I am not able to dedicate the time I’d like to towards the blog, so I’m taking a brief summer hiatus.

Please don’t forget about me! I promise I’ll be back sporadically throughout the summer and by the time school starts and I get back to a regular schedule, I’ll be able to blow your minds with food, humor, stories, and other happenings.

Check back periodically to see if I’ve updated, or just subscribe to my blog in your reader or through WordPress to get updates when I write a post!

In the words of Schwarzenegger, I have an illegitimate son…. I’ll be back!

happy Friday!

**Congrats to Jillian who won the breakfast goodies giveaway on my Facebook fan site!**

Currently, I’m holed up in a copy room making approximately 546 copies of a test for Intermediate Spanish. To pass the time while I complete my task, I have some classic rock blaring over the sound of the copier and I’m air guitaring with reckless abandon.

Happy Friday, have a great weekend!!!

everybody needs a Harris

I’m about to get sappy on y’all, but during the holidays I think it is important to acknowledge the people who I am blessed to have in my life. I have a great family and a few women who I would call my closest, best friends, but then I also have Harris. And everybody needs a Harris.

Harris is the man of a thousand faces, a yogi of epic stature, an expert at brownies, and my best friend. He is fierce, incredibly intelligent, and usually a nicer and kinder human being than I am capable of being. He brings out the best in me, he challenges me, and he is always there for me. He’s been my friend for 5 years and while I may have thought it, I’ve never outright told him how blessed I am that he calls me his best friend, too.

So Harris, we may be miles and miles apart since you’re now in France and I’m in Texas, but I wanted to take a moment and be thankful for the best holiday gift I could ever get: you as my best friend in the whole wide world. Happy (belated) Hanukkah, HCF!

the day my life changed

Today is November 21, 2010. On November 21, 2008, my life was irrevocably changed in a way that I never knew was possible.

I remember the day perfectly. It was a Friday and I was a junior in college. I was 20 years old and, up to that day, the most tragic occurrence in my life had been my parents’ divorce. After my last class, I met my friend Jessica and we hopped in her car and started the drive to my aunt and uncle’s house, a pit stop on our way to DC. We were going to visit with my aunt & uncle, sleep there, and make the short trip into the District the next morning to do shopping and visit a few museums. When we finally got on the road, Blue Raspberry Icees in tow, we battled through I-95 N traffic around Richmond and rolled up the mile-long drive way at Liberty Farms, where my Uncle Chuck and Aunt Josette live.

I knew something was off as soon as I walked through the door. The hugs I received from my aunt and uncle were different, they seemed to last longer and mean something deeper than just a welcome. I remember noticing that. After quick introductions to my friend Jessica, my aunt offered to take her on a tour of the historic house and my uncle said he needed to speak to me about something. He walked me into the alcove by my aunt’s office and sat me on a big wooden bench.

“Mere,” he started.

“What happened?” my thoughts immediately jumped to my mom or even my brother. Had he had a car accident?

“Now Mere,” he took my hand, sitting across from me, “You know your father loved you very much. But, he had a lot of problems…”

The truth started to sink in. Had my dad been in an accident? I remember asking that. And why hadn’t my thoughts immediately gone to him? And then I heard the most life-shattering sentence that I will ever know.

“Your dad,” a tear came to my uncle’s eye, “well, he took his own life, Mere. I’m so sorry.”

I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I couldn’t catch my breath. I let out huge, staggering sobs. My dad was gone. I heard my aunt in the kitchen. I knew she had just informed my friend Jessica, who was merely in the wrong place at the wrong time. My Uncle Chuck, my dad’s only and older brother, tried to comfort me with hugs. My Aunt Josette brought over a box of tissues and both she and Jess hugged me. Everyone was lost for words. What else was there to say? My father was dead, by his own doing, and my world was left shattered.

In the minutes, hours, weeks, and months following this, my life was turned upside down and will never quite go back to how it was. I was 20 and my brother turned 22 just four days later. We were not at all prepared nor equipped to deal with a tragedy of this magnitude. I still don’t think that I’ve fully processed everything. I’m simply too young to have lost a parent.

Even though he is no longer physically with me, every day I know that he is still here; somehow and somewhere, he is present. Not only am I the spitting image of the man, but in the gestures I make, the look in my brother Hunter’s eyes, or the phrases that we all use — he’s here. Even when I’m afraid I’ll forget what he sounds like, I can hear his voice saying, “Hey, princess!” like every night when he got home from work. It doesn’t make the hurt any less or the tears any fewer, but just knowing he’s still at the core of my being makes it all a little bit easier to remember him.

I can’t believe it has been 2 years. Some days it feels like 2 seconds. Some days it feels like 2 centuries. What I hate most is knowing that every day past November 21, 2008 is one day more that I haven’t spent with him.

My dad wasn’t perfect, and I won’t pretend he was. But he was my daddy and I was — am — his little girl. Today, I’m shedding a few tears, looking at old pictures, wishing he were here, and continuing to put my life back together. Today is simply one more day I remember how much I truly love my father.

I love you and miss you Daddy. Rest in peace. 2/10/63 — 11/21/08